Vlorbik's Diner

son of owen's cooking show

Archive for the ‘Rambles’ Category

so beautiful and so dangerous

Posted by vlorbik on June 22, 2016

Photo on 6-21-16 at 9.42 AM

the fresh-dishwater load (before & after).

for preference, the first pass… or first
*few* passes… with fresh soap will be *glass*.

whose praises can hardly be sung enough.
clarity is beauty, baby. hardness, too,
has much to offer. (but they break just
like a butcher’s cleaver if you’re not
looking. and sometime the tiny little
shards come back *weeks* after having
swept up.)

then, who knows. silver if it’s been rinsed.
whatever big pieces would look better on the
other side with very little fuss. certain
items should *never* be soaked; others should
*usually* be soaked. i don’t have a routine,
really. just a process for *finding out* a
routine. everything, all the time; life in
the batplane. but, you know, nothing in

homegrown… ie, here in columbus by friends-
-of-a-friend… eggs for a couple of days. i’m
still lacking in anything you’d call short-order-
-egg-cookin’ skills. unless “fun to eat” counts.
scramble-fried is the way it should be. for today.

Photo on 6-21-16 at 8.16 PM

Posted in DAADD, Rambles | 2 Comments »

omit no happy hour

Posted by vlorbik on September 6, 2014

Photo on 9-6-14 at 5.48 PM

so far today? three colors of greenpepper
and some onion fried in pigfat and stirred
into packet spanish rice with a few baconbits
(breakfast) & then a couple potatoes sliced
as thin as i can if i keep a steady pace,
fried in pretty much the same pigfat…and
a BLT (toast & mayo, natch; 5 ingredients
all told)—lunch. meanwhile, the odd water
and icetea and powdered lemonade and coffee.
greek seasoning in the rice; taco powder all
over the taters. now, maybe, for some nearzero-
-prep junk! ritz, no topping! nah. popcorn,
maybe. or, heck. wait until i’m actually hungry
or something. *that’s* supposed to be a pretty
good trick.

all this is for two of us, i hasten to add.

Posted in DAADD, Rambles | Leave a Comment »

routine maintenance

Posted by vlorbik on May 15, 2014

Photo on 2014-05-14 at 10.31

Photo on 2014-05-14 at 19.33

yesterday we walked down to the end
of the block and back. and i did
(at least) the two dishloads seen
here. other “cooking show” stuff?
mostly forgotten, i fear. i could
bring quite a bit of it back (as i
imagine), though. mostly it was
madeline making the elaborate stuff:
reverse-engineered redd-lobbsterr
style cheese-&-garlic buttery bis-
cuits, for example. no wait. that
was *two* days ago, i guess. the
dishes will appear here clean so
let’s count it. the *cookies*,
she did yesterday. i made her
a ham sandwich. some lemonade,
more or less obviously. and i cut
up the cooked-whole chicken some
more: the bones are all disposed
of now and the skins have mostly
been cracklin’ed down to greezy
crunchy fatpills of delicious
chickeny goodness. we’ve had some
chicken salad (on crackers and
in a sandwich) and some chicken-
-and-rice (“darkmeat” version,
with frozen peas and known-only-to-
-madeline seasonings and whatnot;
yum); of course i’ve nibbled on
the bones & had whatever those
delicious organs are that you’ve
got to dig out of the skeleton
with your pinkie (so that counts
as a third serving so far);
most of the chicken remains to
be consumed. i’ll probably have
the leftover ricedish thingum
soon for brekkie. anyhow, you
get the idea. all is well here,
eating my fool head off, hoping
you are the same. never tell
anybody anything. you get real
hungry all of sudden for no reason.

Posted in DAADD, Rambles | Leave a Comment »

the palm tree in the den and the mock apple pie

Posted by vlorbik on May 9, 2014

Photo on 2014-05-09 at 00.19

Photo on 2014-05-09 at 12.58 #2

the shelves have been torn down
(the rest of the way) and rebuilt
since yesterday. madeline is in
in the middle of making us dessert
(several days worth) but is away
shopping with one of her pals. so
i did a load of dishes (the drainer
is holding up the camera here) and
indulged in various leftovers (to
wit: some tuna-noodle stuff fried
in fat trimmed from its bacon-strips
several days ago, some priced-to-sell
bargain “french” bread, amazing toast-
ed, at a dollar a loaf [with a sell-by
date of the next day], buttered of
course, a few noticeably-stale-but-
-still-pretty-crunchy-at-that corn
chips dipped in some none-the-worse-
-counter salsa, some, almost forgot,
cheddar and some swiss cheese that
i cut up the small “old” blocks of
into ready-for-ritz-cracker slices,
and a little bit of lettuce… i
think that’s it so far today. well,
beverages: sweet creamy coffee &
some lemonade… both “real” and
“stretcher”). soon i’ll make a
ham sandwich with that killer bread.
(mayo, lettuce, tomato, ham, toast…
maybe some swiss [there’s another
block unopened]). wash down with
fresh-squeezed lemonade.

Posted in Books, DAADD, Rambles | Leave a Comment »

a zine, a paperback, and a comedian walk into a bar… no, wait…

Posted by vlorbik on May 7, 2014

Photo on 2014-05-06 at 20.49

Photo on 2014-05-06 at 20.46

the outlined-in-green plastic lid is new;
its counterpart… a new long glass “pan”…
is on a part of the counter (to the right
of the frame) not seen here. the milk carton
is not an endorsement as such; i picked it
up today at the spanish grocery near the
park-and-ride around the corner from living-
ston and brice: “LALA leche entera con
vitamina D” etcetera etcetera. but LALA
certainly has a pleasant ring to it and
who can disagree with a mother-and-baby
(even though they appear to be having
the time of their lives being swept away
on some tidal wave of milk or something)?
the mouse is the mouse. the egg-flipper
sharing the foreground with it is first
of the lot; the fourth-best is next to
the mister-natural-doing-dishes poster
(yay, crumb!) over the toaster at right
hiding the handle of the pizza slicer.
the vegetable oil in the jar under all
that was used in deep-frying yesterday’s

the other shot? well, any beginner ought
to be able to spot chris ware and steranko.
if you know the kurtzman book, you’ll know
that there are plenty of other greats with
work shown on that one cover alone. ditto
the u.s.~mail thingum in the frame. you’ll
maybe be able to guess the painter for the
(also u.s.~mail) sticker next to the frame.
the drawing in the *box* with the sticker
on it is by me (of a statue in the IMU at
IU bloomington). oh, hey. vincent, of
course. that thing on the side of the
cabinet with all the covers on it has lots
of cool art, but even i can’t name any now.
(i’ll be looking it over later on tonight.)
once i tell you that _empire_
is in there, you’ll find it easily enough
if you know it. but i think that’s about
it for artists having the property that one
can point at the photo here shown and say
“that’s so-and-so, and i can tell you how
i can *tell* it’s so-and-so”. could be
i’m wrong. a post this long *always* has
mistakes in it… i’m *bound* to be wrong
about *something*. got counterexamples?

Posted in Comics, DAADD, Rambles | 2 Comments »

yesterday’s news

Posted by vlorbik on April 23, 2014

Photo on 2014-04-22 at 20.01

Photo on 2014-04-23 at 07.12

the afternoon’s first-of-the-day load
included most of the glass… including
the new mason jar (that recently arrived
here full of spaghetti sauce)… and got
the cleanest dishwater. the jar is at
the far right (in front of one of the
[three] plastic pitchers… there’s
usually at least one of these in the
refrigerator, as this shot from
about last week suggests). the photo
shows the evening light; the dishes
had been sitting there for a while
by then and were dry.

and then there’s the second-of-the-day
load from several hours later, photographed
mere minutes ago in the morning light.
remarkable for showing the makeshift
drying rack (with the silverware on
it in front of the faded-dayglo green
counter-cover) for, i think, the first
time here.

meanwhile, grading. farey sequences
should be taught in elementary school.


Posted in DAADD, Rambles | 3 Comments »

come saturday morning

Posted by vlorbik on April 19, 2014

Photo on 2014-04-19 at 10.42

we’ll be headed over to ron’s in
a couple of hours… it’s been a
while since we’ve seen him. with
madeline’s lemon squares in hand,
let me assure you. the powdered
sugar meets the tart fresh-lemon
tang just right. other than that,
plans on the day? not much, not
really. once or twice through
the stack of exams, i imagine…
with maybe some stall-for-time
*reading* in number theory (and
combinatorics) while the home-
work papers themselves wait.
some streaming TV-series eps more
or less of course. (columbo!)
some more guitar (i’ve put in
about half an hour already today)
most likely. about time i made
a recording, at that. and of
course, some *messing about in
the kitchen*…

Posted in DAADD, Rambles | Leave a Comment »

soup pot and cutting board with love and squalor

Posted by vlorbik on March 19, 2014

Photo on 2014-03-19 at 11.55

madeline’s been going double-time on food
what with lots of grocery shopping *and*
lots of homemade goodness like (1) last
night’s potato soup (with skins-on “rooster”
potatoes & plenty of other yummy fresh
ingredients that she even *cut up* with
no prep work by me) and (2) last night’s
“cherry desert” which is this cake-mix &
canned-fruit thing (secret ingredient: butter;
top with koolwhip for extra deep decadent
selfindulgent sensory overload) she’s done
variants on several times now. you can’t see
the pan for (2) here since it’s glass
(and therefore standing by for the glass
*load* that’ll probably take place late
tonight or early tomorrow or so).

i’ve just been grazing on leftovers (and banging down
instant coffee; lots of sugar; milk [but alas no more
half-and-half… i indulged myself earlier this week]).
there’s burgermeat to cut up (& freeze most of). also
tortillas so i’m thinking maybe some kind of quesadilla
action’ll be about right for this afternoons “eps”
(of columbo or of murder she wrote or of the next
generation or what have you) but there’s leftovers
of *two* kinds of soup as well as a little of
the beer-bread. and orange and yellow green-peppers
cleaned (with red and green green-peppers standing by).
so who knows. i might *not* do much more kitchen work
before the next ep of the cooking show…

Posted in DAADD, Rambles | Leave a Comment »

the peppers-&-sausage was a hit; later there was some pretty good stir-fry

Posted by vlorbik on March 12, 2014

Photo on 2014-03-12 at 14.55

spring break rocks. i’ve just been drifting around
the house “shelving”. this can include stuff like
taking a closet door off its hinges or fussing for
hours with the coins or the stamps or the games
or the maps. or even some individual book, some-
times. mostly it’s moving paper around. often
rather a lot at once, so it’s kind of physically
demanding. which is a good thing, don’t get me
wrong. it’s *leaving the house* that’s *psychically*
demanding, and “spring break” is the best chance
in a while to go for some major stay-at-home-itude.
anyhow, what shelving is *not*, is grading. you’ll
be reading about some of that in the blog next door
with any luck. what shelving *is* kinda like,
is washing dishes… particularly the “putting ’em
away” phase, of course, which typically even involves
actual *shelves*, but also in the “prepping’em for
the soapy-water” phase, which, now that i think
of it, has a sort of a “putting ’em away *for now*”
character (that’s unmistakably shelving-like),
or, for that matter, in the cramming-em-anywhere-
-they’ll-fit drainer-loading phase (whose results
i’ve been photographing whenever convenient),
which partakes of exactly the same character.
all the arts are one art. but some are more
grading-like than others.

Posted in DAADD, Rambles | Leave a Comment »

vlorbik’s scramble-fried eggs

Posted by vlorbik on January 9, 2013

slab of bacon fat
three eggs
shot of milk
hunk of cheddar cheese
red onion
ground red pepper
garlic powder
ground thyme

grab one of the new steel pans
from its nail beside the stove
and start heating it up to the
“third” setting. bust up the
bacon fat into its constituent
slice-fractions and put it in
to render.

break the eggs into one of the
gorgeous glass mixing-and-serving
bowls. the little one, indeed,
if it’s not already in use or
in the waiting-for-washing area.

if it should then occur, as it
might, that one of the eggbreakings
reveals a never-before-encountered
tendency for the hard *outer* shell
of the egg to separate from the
more flexible—even *skinlike*—
inner shell beneath while the
meat of the egg quivers around
*inside* the whole contraption,
well, then *go* with it. see
how much of the hard stuff you
can get off away from the membrane-
-thingy without busting everything
wide open. no, wait. time to check
on the bacon. go ahead and pierce
through the darn thing and get the
white-and-yolk in the bowl; set the
shell aside for later inspection.

stir up the pigfat. okay, that’s about
enough… and the edges are getting burny.
knock the chunks out; the pan’s ready.
turn it up to “second”.

chop up the onion… about enough to cover
the palm of your hand… and drop it
into the eggs. pour in the shot of milk.
stir vigorously with a fork.

pour the whole mess into the pan.
if all has gone well, the bottom part
will fry itself to a fairly hard state
that can be manipulated easily with
the steel turning-tool.

grate up a bunch of the cheese and lay it
on top of one half. try and fail to fold
the other half over onto this half
in omelette-like fashion. curse mildly
and mix the whole thing up into a mishmosh.
turn it back down to third.

look up at the cabinet area immediately
above the cutting-stuff-up counter just
to the side of the stove… the “spice
rack”, in other words… and grab some
stuff that looks like it might be appealing.
on another day, it’ll’ve been the “greek
seasoning” premix or even good old-fashioned
salt-and-p, but in this case it turns out to
be the pepper-garlic-thyme thing. season
to taste. stir it up some more; set it down
to “warm”.

okay. it’s no omelette, but it’s looking
pretty good. try some, right out of the pan.
yep. holy moley! drop toast! what’s *wrong*
with you? turn off the burner but leave the
pan on; its long handle is still cool and
it’s better than any plate for eating from.

serves one. tastes great.
(madeline believes eggs are ingredients
not entrees. so i made her a breakfast
sandwich an hour ago or so:
toasted sandwich rounds (2)
cream cheese
tomato slice
lettuce leaf
slather the c.c. onto the bottom slice;
lay the tomato & lettuce on top;
put the top slice on and crunch it down
slightly; slice off a small piece and eat it
[“quality control”]; serve.)

Posted in Rambles, Recipes | 4 Comments »