Vlorbik's Diner

son of owen's cooking show

daadd vi

Posted by vlorbik on March 31, 2010

cf. iv.i or for that matter, the whole file.

today i took off four doors…
“deconstruction” if you will.
also i uploaded an old one-pager:
against kitchen cabinets.
the wheels turn slow but grind exceeding small.

3 Responses to “daadd vi”

  1. vlorbik said

    google profile data; i always seem to lose this…

    owen thomas
    type type type type type at swain hall pubs ink; Student at (google says so, not me).
    online mostly alas

    Away (only visible to your chat buddies)

    About meContact info Edit profile
    once upon a time there was a robot and once upon a time there was a guy and the guy could never tolerate the robot and of course the robot didn’t even try so the robot and the guy they had a fight and from then on they’ve been at it day and night and as far as i can see it’s the same for you and me i think we’ll all be fighting robots by and by (my oh my) i think we’ll all be fighting robots till we die.
    Where I grew up
    indiana university
    Places I’ve lived
    bloomington (in), zagreb, greater LA, vegas, indy, and columbus (oh); the “my places” thingy is laughably wrong.
    Companies I’ve worked for
    schools mostly
    Schools I’ve attended
    i.u. mostly
    Other names

  2. vlorbik said


  3. vlorbik said

    Against Kitchen Cabinets (“manuscript” version)
    Go into anybody’s home. Look in the kitchen.
    Overhead cabinets with doors on them.
    You can’t see inside. What’s in which? You’ll have to open them to find
    out. But why? Are we ashamed of having dishes? Do we want to
    forget that we have groceries?

    OK. Suppose it’s your own home.
    You know what goes in which cabinets.
    But you’ve got your hands full of groceries or dishes that you want to put
    away. Oops, too bad! There’s a door in the way! You’ll have to put
    something down first. Maybe the countertops are all covered
    and you have to bend over and put stuff on the floor. Maybe you
    try to fit your load onto the counter and knock something down.
    Is there some reason you shouldn’t be able to just put the stuff into
    the cabinet in the first place?
    And why should it take both hands?

    Go into any restaurant. Look in the kitchen. Shelves. Lots of them.
    You can see what’s on which shelf and it’s all right there ready to be
    used. These guys are
    pros. They admit they’re in a kitchen and they’re ready to do something
    about it.

    Apparently it’s some esthetic thing: doors are believed to
    look better than the stuff they prevent us from seeing and
    reaching. Well, de gustibus non disputandum. To
    me they look stupid.

    There’s always a slim chance that I’m missing something. I didn’t know
    until recently what the doors on my closets were for. They were
    badly hung, and as they inevitably jammed, I’d take them off and
    put them in the basement, out of the way, instead of “fixing” them
    by putting them back in the way. I found out a couple years
    later they did have a purpose. They’re for keeping out cats.

    So maybe I’m wrong. Maybe. But
    sooner or later, deny it though you will,
    you’re going to hit your head on one of those
    damn doors and it’s really going to hurt.
    Don’t say I didn’t tell you so.
    Posted by r. r. vlorbik at 1:15 PM

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